Why don't you show me how to do that ?

 When is the last time you met a guy, who gave you free tips on any given topic ? Start a discussion and such people will come over, and tell you "Hey, I know a lot about that. I am telling you will never get over with it till you listen to me." You think, " Fucker! I have never listened to you till now  and I have got over everything in my life. What made you think that I won't get over it?"

This time it happened to me, not so suprisingly I was on the other side this time. Yes, I was the advisor. 

My friend was quite unsatisfied by his "girlless" life, so everytime he came over to our place, me and my roommate showered him with tips and homeworks to do. All these tips were meant to increase his confidence with girls. With my recent addiction to the books on dating, I was quite confident about my knowledge in the field of opening up to girls. Like always, yesterday, I was giving him his routine dose with unprecented confidence. This time he opened up, "You know, I have also read about this dating stuff a lot. But I don't think it is possible in India." 

I had a time tested answer to my rescue, "You are being a pessimist. You are giving up even before trying. Have you ever tried ? How can you say that ? " 

"Why don't you show me how to do that?"

"I ... I ..I am not able to find a place, where I can try these things."

"What about shopping mall ? Hyderabad centeral ?"

"That really seems to be a good place. Lets meet there at 6 PM tommorrow." 

I was totally only on his mercy or my "not so perfect" skills to appraoch girls. Depending upon later one was like dreaming to cross pacific on an ice cream stick.

 Next day, I kept myself busy at 6 and there was no contact from his side either. Happy with my luck, I called him at 6:45 to show him that I was really ready to be the teacher. Somehow he convinced me to meet 1 hr later at the mall. I was praying that he never shows up. You know, I am not as lucky as I think.

What happened next really do not needs to be explained. It was my first time and there was a lot of my own made pressure on me to perform. In one line, I tanked badly and my student was really good at not making fun of me, giving me tips and agreeing with me that it was difficult.

I'm telling you, I know a lot about this. If you will give tips on a topic that you don't know much about, you won't be able to get over with it.

I wish I was a genius

There are times when I look myself and feel almost lost in the crowd, then suddenly someone comes and shows some traits of being genius. At this point I feel further lost in the crowd. Not exactly though, when I see a genius then I always congratulate myself for recognizing the genius. After all only a genius can recognize another genius.

I wish, I was like Einstein, breaking age old concept of time, telling people that you had always been naive to understand the truth. Its like telling them "Oh! don't worry, it was never your fault, you were born intelligent but education ruined you." But I don't want to invent nothing as complicated as relativity. In fact I believe in simple concepts (our time and energy are precious, conserve them). Theories must be as simple as those given by Newton.

I wish, I was like Newton. With a highly rare incident of an apple falling on my head (it really never happened to me), I should have given a theory. A theory so simple, that there is nothing left to be taught about it by the time child crosses 16 years of age. Of course then there are trouble makers like Einstein. Its all because of the creator, the God, (for Atheists and Agnostics, the fault is of creation itself). Why everything has to follow such complex rules, that of Einstein? Why can't the Nature follow whatever Newton said? Why the light had to travel at a constant speed irrespective of the observer? I hate light for observing such behavior. In fact all electromagnetic rays, should be expelled out of the "Nature Community" for making things so much complicated. But then they are useful, let them be there. Lets look for another genius.

I wish, I was Edison. I would never try to make a bulb after 1000 + failures. I don't know but how did he defined one failure? "Oh I forgot to plug in the wire, 1 failure, oh this time i didn't connect the wire into to bulb another failure, the bulb wasn't actually bulb, it was someone's head... oh shit another failure. " Nothing personal, Sir Thomas Elva Edison, I am a little envious of you. I do appreciate your work and also understand your message, or the story tellers' message to try again and again till you succeed. Edison was an engineer, the one who applied the Nature's strange nature to his use. Hence, different from other genius who wanted to know more about Nature.

Of all the three, I like being Newton seems to easiest and interesting. Its like telling all the people "Oh! it was so simple, it never struck you ? I was always wondering why things fell down."

I don't know, I would be able to be like them, still the wish to be like them fill me with a proud feeling, that I can't explain.

I wish I was a genius

There are times when I look myself and feel almost lost in the crowd, then suddenly someone comes and shows some traits of being genius. At this point I feel further lost in the crowd. Not exactly though, when I see a genius then I always congratulate myself for recognizing the genius. After all only a genius can recognize another genius.

I wish, I was like Einstein, breaking age old concept of time, telling people that you had always been naive to understand the truth. Its like telling them "Oh! don't worry, it was never your fault, you were born intelligent but education ruined you." But I don't want to invent nothing as complicated as relativity. In fact I believe in simple concepts (our time and energy are precious, conserve them). Theories must be as simple as those given by Newton.

I wish, I was like Newton. With a highly rare incident of an apple falling on my head (it really never happened to me), I should have given a theory. A theory so simple, that there is nothing left to be taught about it by the time child crosses 16 years of age. Of course then there are trouble makers like Einstein. Its all because of the creator, the God, (for Atheists and Agnostics, the fault is of creation itself). Why everything has to follow such complex rules, that of Einstein? Why can't the Nature follow whatever Newton said? Why the light had to travel at a constant speed irrespective of the observer? I hate light for observing such behavior. In fact all electromagnetic rays, should be expelled out of the "Nature Community" for making things so much complicated. But then they are useful, let them be there. Lets look for another genius.

I wish, I was Edison. I would never try to make a bulb after 1000 + failures. I don't know but how did he defined one failure? "Oh I forgot to plug in the wire, 1 failure, oh this time i didn't connect the wire into to bulb another failure, the bulb wasn't actually bulb, it was someone's head... oh shit another failure. " Nothing personal, Sir Thomas Elva Edison, I am a little envious of you. I do appreciate your work and also understand your message, or the story tellers' message to try again and again till you succeed. Edison was an engineer, the one who applied the Nature's strange nature to his use. Hence, different from other genius who wanted to know more about Nature.

Of all the three, I like being Newton seems to easiest and interesting. Its like telling all the people "Oh! it was so simple, it never struck you ? I was always wondering why things fell down."

I don't know, I would be able to be like them, still the wish to be like them fill me with a proud feeling, that I can't explain.

What did your instinct say?

One day sitting in my room alone, having nothing to do I was thinking about the ultimate question. Why I was born, why I was send to this place? No one answered, no voice came from the skies. No written document fell from the skies to tell me that I have vowed something in lieu of coming on this earth. I waited for two more days praying to God to tell me my purpose of being here. But no one answered. So I took this as God answer.
"You fool! do you expect me to break nature's to answer a silly question of yours. Suppose you were to create robots for a definite purpose, what you would have done to tell them their purpose of existence? Is it a wise way to write down books, or make skies speak out the purpose of existence? You would have surely wired in their purpose of existence. So that they always tend to serve their purpose of existence. You would have programmed his purpose of existence into him only.
That's what I have done, I have given you inner instincts of things that I want you to do. Have you ever listened to your heart truly. It always says to love everyone. But sometimes when someone behaves badly with you, your heart tells you to retaliate. This is because I want you to retaliate, to defend yourself against bad persons, and if you are really stronger to defend the weak from the bullies. I have given you the feelings, all the feelings anger, happiness, sympathy, kindness. All these feelings are nothing but guidelines embedded in you to tell you what to do in this world."
"Suppose the two humans I made first were emotionless, feeling less creatures. They would not have united to form the human race. I have given you an urge to do things in a better way. That's why you have invented things. I have given you an urge to be better then your neighbor. I have given you a tendency to be proud of your neighbor when competition is against some distance society. I have given humans an ambition to get known, to get famous, to get powerful."
"But the brain, which I have given you to do things in a better way, sometimes overpowers the mind, my guidelines to "What to do in this world?". I fed into your mind that be better then others, so that you are not idle all the time, so that you have some kind of motivation to work in life, a motivation to do something beyond food, shelter and clothing. But some of you read your heart once and put brain to work afterwards. So as of result of this, you do everything that requires to surpass our neighbor. You hurt and oppress many humans in the process. If you scan you actions in light of your heart than you shall do anything which I don't want you to do. Instructions for every being in this world are different, and have been programmed into them, in their heart, they just need to listen to their heart"

When I was on sale...

Who I am ? Why should a company hire me? Why do I want to join a company?

Why do I want to join your company?
What the hell man.... I want to join every company above 6 lacs , which is a little well established, that people( basically my friends) consider good.
Why not a better a company then yours? Because THEY kicked me out.
Why not MS/MBA? I do not have sufficient resources for MS.

Why should a company hire me?
Ok I don't have good communication skills, but I can convey my self clearly to anyone. Ok I may not know everything about my field, but I can dig out the required knowledge when and where required and apply those skills. I can do almost any kind of work.

What are your weakness?
I am poor at answering this question.
poor handwriting .....let it be
poor communication skills ........improve them
poor language skills ......improve them
poor sleeping habits ......improve them
poor reading habits .....improve them
only concentrate on contents not on the packaging .......start concentrating
poor technical knowledge ........
poor general knowledge ........
be a hard worker